Saturday, April 16, 2011


In total I guess it matters very little about the details of who cheated on who, or who became the most put upon. The fact is that loss is loss on all sides. Nine years is a great investment in a spouse and a lot to toss out with the bath water. As in any game each move is a part of it, but random luck plays a role that no one can predict.

I miss having my wife. I miss the friendship. I miss sleeping next to a warm woman that means the world to me. As with any disease the symptoms are the hardest part to cope with, but not the cause.

I loved her very much, and she could not feel it. The reasons are symptomatic of a lifetime of pain and mistrust on every side. I hurt, but I will survive. She hurts, but she will survive. I hate that pain so much.

I can't see her anymore because the hurt is a blinder. I can't hear her anymore because the sound was so loud that ringing is all there is. I can't feel her anymore because I have blisters and callouses from the toil. I can't smell her now because the tears have my nose stopped hard up. I can't taste her skin because the bitter is the only thing on my tongue. She is gone, we are gone, us is gone... I am here trying to not make matters worse to little avail.
:: posted by Tennessee Jed, 8:44 AM


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